10/29/2005
noone but me from URL @ 8:47 PM
yes!
its been a nice two days.
fri- went to amk seoul,
ate two rounds! :)
celebrated ruthika bdae
went to city hall,
went to the esplanade,
yelled at some guy tt sunm claimed was her love at first sight!
got my elephant pic! <3
walked along the ndp route,
stood in my ndp position!!
touched the padang sand :) [ehh, historic OKAY!]
touched the historic supreme high court building
bought cheap stuff
bought a ring watch!
saw someone!! and someone, got high~
attended the piano recital- was good!
went back to esplanade.
t'was a beautiful night![ my latest out- 2300!]
chionged home
superb beauty sleep! :)
sat- woke up late
aunty bought bk burger for breakfast- hahaa, ate it!
about to start cooking lunch, then dad came with food frm another aunty's house.!
went for novena.
watched zorro!! [antonio banderas and catherine zeta jones look good tog]
bought chendol, popiah and carrot cake.[ with my dad and bro! not alone,]
went home, ate those. decided i needed to exercise.
jogged to east coast.
climbed a tree and sat up there, staring at the beach with the breeze in my face :) i like!!
thought about a LOT of things, manymanymany actually,
and i've decided to remain positive. for as long as possible. -smiles :)
[rmbred the times when matt and i used to jog there too, and climb on a tree and sit and talk about anything under the blue blue sky. somehow it doesnt feel right climbing a tree alone now]
HAHAA!
so ive had two wonderful days.
tml im gna go to the graveyard- visit my relatives.
probably will come home and cry my heart out.
hey, but whats life if there's smiles but no tears? :)
*cheers~
life is a swirl of colours.
pick out the purple, pink and orange
and throw out the grey, black and white.
its in your hands.
you're all you ever need.
10/27/2005
noone but me from URL @ 9:15 PM
hope, you die of every cancer that existed.
gramma- stroke [passed on]
grampa-?? [passed on]
my fav aunty- stomach cancer [passed on]
my bro's fav aunty- throat cancer [passed on]
my dad's bro- stroke [passed on]
my aunty- low blood pressure.
my dad- high blood pressure[moderate], diabetes[moderate], stomach bleeding[ which doc says can lead to stomach cancer]
my gramma- stroke, diabetes, alzheimers. [passed on]
my grampa- ??
many dear people have passed on.
noone in my family has died a natural death
im gna die of-- cancer, diabetes, stroke, high blood pressure and suffer with alzheimers.
i don dread death.
i dread living as people i love die.
its like a part of you dying off with them;
and trust me i know- it takes a long time to heal
at 14, ive witnessed 8 deaths.
-undergone 8 deaths together with them
and it SUCKS.
ok, i dunnow why im suddenly rambling about death.
maybe its cos of all the separation today.
i somehow dont feel detached yet, except that i already miss geraldine.
i think- she's one of the few that keeps my earth rotating.
ok this is all irrelevant.
nvm, im gg for tha piano recital tml.
i like. im in the mood for piano.
and im looking forward.
god, i call out to you.
i dont want death, i dont want anyone i love to die. i do not.
death is an inevitable part of life.
10/24/2005
noone but me from URL @ 8:49 PM
humpty dumpty sat on a wall
humpty dumpty had a great fall
all of the king's horses and all of the king's men
couldn't put humpty together again.
hmmm.
doesn't this nursery rhyme make too much sense,
to be labelled a nursery rhyme?
10/23/2005
noone but me from URL @ 11:52 PM
your sensitivity and intuition
help you to absorb the
sights, sounds
and atmosphere when you're in unfamiliar surroundings.
-sunday times, horoscope, taurus
somtimes in familiar surroundings too, don't you think
you see, hear, sense everything- like they all have the intentions of hurting you.
things that you can't particularly adapt to.
especially when you're alone.
again, i have to deal with them.
like it doesnt matter
this is an incoherent entry
maybe one of my ramblings.
random thoughts that affect me.
you know in the end-
come what may,
i'll face it, ON MY OWN.
10/21/2005
hdfff
noone but me from URL @ 7:37 PM
i realise that when you are alone,
you notice more things.
your senses are more alert,
and you are aware of almost everything.
which, sometimes makes it all the worst,
cos you notice stuff that you don't like,
that hurt you,
especially when you're all alone,
that make you cry.
i've stopped crying.
indifference perhaps?
i choose to believe that i have become stronger.
that such trivial matter dont bother me.
-you know, but yet they do.
i dont know.
i laugh more with anybody other than them
i enjoy the company of anybody other than them
freaking twisted people who make use of others' misery to their advanatage.
unappreciative bitches.
i had TAF camp today.
yeaa!
its fun, or rather, anything is fun as long as you take a positive approach to it.
i like my group.
couch tomatoes!
i think we're effective.
and i will work on my frizbee playing skills
but tml they say, there might be a psl meeting.
so sunm and jannah wont be there[maybe?]
only left me, jubi and others.
*OTHERS. hahaa.
im excited for tml!:)
hope sunm can come though.
not the same w/o her- my buddehh.
either ways, im still excited!
-CHEERS!
i seem to be enjoying every moment i spend away frm them
10/18/2005
noone but me from URL @ 9:44 PM
my dad was sweet.
yea.
not particularly in the best of moods.
betrayal. threesomes. family.
many more. shant say
he actually noticed,
which shows my mask is fading
i just said cos of my marks.
and he talked to me abt him screwing and so being motivated 2 do btr,
etc etc.
yeaa.
nice.
:)
ive decided, if my efforts are not equal to others marks,
i need to work harder right?
so no point brooding over them, but move on. right?
but u know, for the effort you put in the marks you get, just puts you down.
grr.
come what may.
i'll face it.
on MY OWN.
10/17/2005
noone but me from URL @ 7:09 PM
oh you see,
i thought science was ok too.
so if you put two and two together;
i thought tamil was ok- and i failed paper 2.
i thought sci was ok- and ?
i think im failing section B.
damn electricity.
hhh
noone but me from URL @ 7:01 PM
and i thought tamil was ok.
freak, i failed paper 2.
FAILED.
STREAMING.
TAMIL.
got a pathetic b4 in the end-
and the whole level is teeming with A1s and A2s.
GOSH.
haii. i should consider dropping hmt.
but there's no tamil in cedar, only higher tamil.
so dunnow where i'll go? yea.
but wth, am i supposed to do my Os this time next yr, when ive just failed paper 2?
freak.
eng was ok.
tml is maths.
everyone was saying it was rather do-able.
except me, as usual.
geog too- i came up with my own ans, not hearing of clean tech in my whole life.
lit too- of all thgs, i din study abt mr morrison.
so yes u all,
i am screwing my streaming,
thank you.
and my frens are screwing me.
but i don need them.
i'll survive.
just noe exactly easy getting away frm them.
10/16/2005
heyho!
noone but me from URL @ 8:46 PM
i am HIGH
WOOHOOO!!
from yesterday~ [specs and the beach made my day]
to today~ [the handsome guy who smiled!]
im clinging on to my happiness highness.
YEAAAA
smile people smile
its a good day today.
tml, its gna be so empty, so quiet and so stable.
nomore earthquakes.
nomore angels.
nomore rocks.
gosh, how will we all survive i wonder?
but for now- im HIGH!!!
10/13/2005
--
noone but me from URL @ 10:26 PM
i am feeling nothing.
indifferent.
i learnt some new things today.
its stuff that i already actually knew about.
just reminded about it today
truth be told it scares the hell out of me each day
i dont need no freaking reminders.
so i say im over it. yes i laugh i smile.
but why the hell tell me things that you know will hurt
i am not iron woman.
i may be tough; strong
but fire can still burn me
your words can still hurt me.
i remember saying i wanted to harden my heart
make it void of emotions
maybe this is the result?
indifference though it kills.
the night goes on. the stars continue to shine while the moon continues to live a lie.
10/11/2005
noone but me from URL @ 8:05 PM
a simple smile.
a few words.
make a big difference.
And I don't wanna fall to pieces
I just want to sit and stare at you
I don't want to talk about it
And I don't want a conversation
I just want to cry in front of you
I don't want to talk about it
Cuz I'm in Love With you
10/01/2005
bro
noone but me from URL @ 9:39 PM
I'd never thought i'd live to see this day.
my brother has become a gentleman!
like, REALLY.
ok. eg1: there was only one burger bun at home
both of us wanted it.
so firstly i gave in, saying nahh forget it.
i could do w/o the few calories.
then SUDDENLY..
my brother was like " sarah ka[tamil for sis] u take larr. nvm i eat the burger meat with normal bread."
GOSH!
gracious OK! its like he was VOLUTARILY giving up his burger bun for me!!
WOOHH!!
so i thought he's growing up maturing.
then he asked, "what are u gonna do now?"
so i said i was gna watch the powerpuff girls movie.
and he said..
(with great enthusiasm)-- "POWERPUFF GIRLS!! i want to watch!!"
-_-
my brother rocks larr.
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